Genre: general, humor
Length: 567 Words
Summary: Changmin and Jaejoong are roommates in their first year of college. Jaejoong came back drunk last night.
A/N: Infinite possiblities for sequels because "Jaejoong" is my roommate. Prompt #21-Juice
Penises are ugly, Changmin thinks as Jaejoong is telling him the story of how over the weekend he might have hooked up with his dance captain right on the bed he sleeps in. Changmin made a glance at his own bed and noted the covers remained untouched from when he left on Friday.
“It started in the elevator, and somehow we were making out on my bed. Changmin, I woke up without underwear on. I don’t remember what happened; I was so drunk.” Even though just a few weeks before he had been boasting that he didn’t really lose his memory while drinking.
As Jaejoong is telling him this, Changmin is putting on the most pleasant and trusting mask of all ages. He pictures Jaejoong without his underwear on as he wakes up the next morning in bed, alone. And what Changmin pictures is the image of Jaejoong’s hairless balls, ass, and penis. Penises are ugly, Changmin thinks.
Sure, he has one and doesn’t mind it, literally not manscaping nearly the same amount as Jaejoong (who will occasionally take a razor to his seemingly hairless legs in the middle of the room). Changmin is fine with his male parts and doesn’t wish for female ones, vagina envy one might call it. And that is that. As accepting of sexuality and promiscuity as he is, he is not one to put an actual foot into that kind of life.
But Changmin has watched and read enough pornos to simply smile and laugh as Jaejoong grieves. Neither mentions the mess the room was when Changmin returned from a weekend at home. Neither mentions how Jaejoong’s girlfriend would flip shit if she found out. And Jaejoong especially doesn’t mention how far he went, whether he topped or bottomed and if he liked it.
Because Jaejoong’s dance captain is male. It’s an all-male dance team.
“You could have stopped it if you were here.” Jaejoong groans. The social butterfly he is, even though the entire thing embarrasses him beyond belief, he still has to tell someone, anyone.
Changmin grins and laughs airily. “I might have said ‘um, can you not have sex while I am in the room, or put a sock on the doorknob’ and that would be the end of it.”
Jaejoong laughs, a real laugh. “Oh my gosh, I can see you walking in on us and being ‘Nope, I’ll come back later, text me when you’re done’.” Changmin’s smile twitches, because those actions fit him and Jaejoong kind of nails his indifferent voice.
“You know me so well.”
The one thing Changmin really doesn’t want to ask is where the high heels came from, because there was a pair of blue pumps in front of his side of the closet. He had kicked them away absent mindedly before, but now there were some questions hanging. A few reasonable answers form in his head, but Changmin isn’t sure enough to know which one is right. Maybe Jaejoong likes to dress like a woman when drunk, or maybe a lady friend had come over. Perhaps the heels are one of Jaejoong’s sister’s; he did have eight of them. One thing is for sure, the heels are in Jaejoong’s size.
Changmin prays that the next time Jaejoong goes out drinking underage (“Its only bitter juice” he says), he doesn’t come back with a person who doesn’t belong in the room.
Sequel: Candles, among other things, are not allowed